So we're getting closer to wedding season. Yayyy woohooo. Don't get me wrong I'm very excited and I feel very fortunate that I'm invited to 6 weddings this year. It's gonna be a rockin good time and I'm gonna drink lots of champagne and dance lots of macarenas. But going to this many weddings just make sme feel like the last single girl on earth sometimes. It's difficult when everyone else is settling down and I feel like I'm just getting started. I don't know if I'll ever settle down. I'm gonna need a lot more life experience before I feel ready to do that. I wish I had at least one completely single girlfriend to go out and cruise guys with. Now is this my fate? Am I going to be the token single girl forever? All this wedding stuff is making me feel like an old maid and I'm only 27. 27 is very young. We're in the age of Sex and the City where we can be single and fabulous in your 30s and 40s. But everyone's different. We all want different things in life. I never wanted to be married before I was at least 30. That stuff just isn't a priority to me. It makes me feel suffocated. But I've got nothing holding me back and I'm free to do whatever I want.
This makes me want to go out and do something crazy and completely independent again like going to Africa for 4 months. That was the most amazing experience of my life and I could have never done it if I was tied down to someone. I'm the kind of person who needs to run free with no attachments. But I know you can't let other people's choices effect your own. I just need to do my own thing and get what I want out of life. I'm going to be taking 3 classes at DCCC and fixing my education. Then this spring I'm going to be applying to graduate schools for the fall. Its exciting and intimidating at the same time. I need to stop doubting myself and I believe that I CAN do whatever I put my mind to. I'm gonna have to work my ass off and I'll be too busy to feel sorry for my lonely, single self.
Then who knows. I still dream of moving to New York where everyone is single and neurotic like me. I have friends there and I could start over. I feel like I belong there. I have a feeling someday I will live there I just don't know how soon it will be. I just need to focus on my present goals for now: work my ass off at school, find better job, save $, etc. and that will be a long term accomplishment.
Some of my favorite things right now:
I love these girls. I wish I could be Diablo Cody.
Funny as hell:
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